"Focus on the positive," they say.
"You're so talented," they say.
"Hone your strengths," they say.
"You're flawed. Own it," said no one ever.
Until now.
We can fuel our HeartFire and incite action that will change the world, but even the most talented among us—the women that make you think "how does she do it all," will tell you that they don't do it all. (Assuming that they are authentic and human.) They own the light of their Goddess Gifts, but they also own their dark side.
You have a dark side, too. You're flawed. Imperfect. A Shadow hangs over you. Actually, a shadow lies within and around you. Sometimes it's even out in front.
I still love you and I want you to own your weaknesses. Be just as open about them as you are about your gifts because you can't be a light for others without first shining the light of inquiry on yourself.
There's another very good reason to get seriously honest. When you snuggle up to your shadow, it loses the power to captivate, distract or otherwise sabotage you. Knowing your mental defaults - the well-worn grooves in your thinking - is how you begin to unwind shadow's capacity to captivate.
(If you're thinking you don't have a shadow side, then you have even more inner work to do than the rest of us, so sit tight and keep reading.)
Are you...
Over-busy-ing?
I know, it's not really a word: but you know what I mean, don't you? Are you letting the endless To-Do's and task lists keep you a slave to achievement? Are you spinning your wheels trying to accomplish 20 different things in a single day? Are you feeling ungrounded, overwhelmed and unfocused?
Never satisfied?
You could solve world hunger today, but tomorrow you start at zero all over again. You're either trying to beat yesterday's accomplishments or trying to compensate for a lack thereof.
Procrastinating?
You haven't started designing/planning/selling because
The World Cup only happens every 4 years, you might as well watch.
Orange is the New Black
The phone rings, the baby cries and your Facebook feed beckons.
Whining?
Somebody already took your idea, you'll never be as good / pretty / wise as [insert your personal Shero] so why try?
You're too busy to do your creative work, it's too hot and you'retoo tired.
Any of these sound like you?
You may be feeling a little guilty at this point.
Let's not wallow in guilt.
After all, wallowing in your weaknesses isn't helpful.
May I suggest that you just own them?
Society has taught us to hide our flaws. Skin breaking out? "Slather it in concealer, cover that in foundation and top it off with powder" says the world. BUT, you and I both know, it's only when you let that sweet face get some oxygen and free it from that chemical funk, that the skin starts to heal. Beautiful skin comes from the inside and so does a beautiful, prosperous life.
You almost forgot we were talking about your real flaws (didn't you?)—not the ones we can cover up with makeup, but rather the ones that are preventing you from doing your best work in the world.
The only way to stop sweeping things under the rug is to get rid of the rug. Here's how you start:
: Be honest with yourself
If you struggle with procrastination (for example), ask:
How effectively are you using your time?
How rigid are you with your schedule?
Is that schedule working?
How often are you getting distracted?
What is distracting you from the work that is important?
: Return to the Present Moment.
When you find your thoughts have wandered far far away from the task at hand, evaluate. Stop strengthening the distraction habit, too, by doing one. thing. only. No more checking Facebook in the car line, talking on the phone in the grocery store, eating and reading.
One. Thing. Only.
Then, ask yourself:
Does what you are doing support your long-term, purpose-driven Life Vision?
If it does, than get back to it. If it doesn't, why you are making time for it in your life? Are you getting distracted because the tasks that you're filling your day don't align with the future you want to create for yourself? Stop wasting your time.
Yes, getting back to work is important. But getting back to the right type of work is much more valuable.
: Plan & Incentivize
There are planners and there is everyone else. And even the planners have their flaws. I can fill an 18 month calendar with beautifully patterned washi tape. I know when I start, where my mid point is and when I end every project for the next 5 years. But, even the most prepared, have their moments.
Keep yourself focused with little celebrations for your accomplishments. Live each day as close to your Ideal Day as possible while intentionally acting on the small steps needed to bring you closer to your future dreams. Keep your eye on the prize, but don't lose your intention along the way.
Enough about flaws for now (you're not off the hook though), let's celebrate your gifts. Hop over to the Kula and share - we want to celebrate you!
Enjoy,
